Same as what is on myspace

For once I feel I have some things to say that EVERYONE should hear. First of all, yes my blog was about Alisha and no I am not mad at her. Nor do I think you all should think she is a horrible person, I certainly don't. It's just that I needed to tell her those things. Before that relationship was poisonous for me. So honestly I feel relieved about the thing you said, Alisha. It sparked something in me that I have been smothering for FAR to long. As to the matter of us being friends again, I certainly hope it is possible. I am now completely ready for that eventuality, because the fact is that our first go didn't go so well. And the main point of this message is so that not only you but EVERYONE knows the reason for that. It had nothing to do with Alisha. It was my fault and I take full responsibility. I had an extremely hard childhood mostly because of my family and my religion. When I met Alisha it was a turning point for me. She was quirky and out there and perfect and I clung to her. I spent 4 years torturing myself, thinking that I wasn't good enough and then any day she would decide she was too good to be my friend and would drop me, it had happened to me before. I was jealous and anxious and depressed. And now I feel so good, so right. Not happy, exactly, but right. Because she said she didn't want to be my friend. And you know what happened? Absolutely nothing. The world kept spinning, my heart kept beating, and glory of glories I STILL HAD FRIENDS. People still inexplicably loved me. And I got down on my knees and kissed the ground and thanked my lucky stars. Because I think I'll get better now. And for that I am so grateful to you Alisha. You'll never know how grateful. The entire point of the blog was just to hear exactly what you said in your comment. That you hurt too. Because that right there told me we were equals. You were no better than me. You needed and loved me too. And that was all I needed to hear for the past for years. So as they say time heals all wounds. I really hope you will give me another chance to be your friend. Cause honestly in this day and age two girls like us need each other. So please everyone forget about this if you can. And please, Alisha, call me when your ready.